792. Michael Kiske / Instant Clarity. 1996. 1/5

There was always going to be an element of ridicule in going into tracking down, purchasing and then listening to this album. It's like watching a movie and knowing how it is going to end, but you watch it anyway, because there is always that chance that you could be mistaken, and it could end a different way. Michael Kiske was a known quality. The brilliant lead singer who presided over arguably Helloween's two finest albums, Keeper of the Seven Keys Part I and Keeper of the Seven Keys Part II, and then was heavily involved in the writing and performing of arguably their two worst albums, Pink Bubbles Go Ape and Chameleon. It was following Chameleon that he was fired from Helloween, and he publicly divulged his abhorrence of heavy metal as a medium, and wanted to hide as far away from it as he possibly could. Thus is the double-edged sword of buying Instant Clarity - you want to hear work from this marvellous singer, but you just know that in all probability it is going to be absolute rubbish.
Guess what?! This is EXACTLY how you expect this album to be if you weighed up all of the factors above. This is Michael's first solo album, and the songs range in style from the boring and predictable to the astoundingly bizarre. Ballads and slow songs abound, causing writhing on the floor and gagging and the odd moment of 'Exorcist' vomiting whilst they assault your senses.

The opening track "Be True to Yourself" I guess is a metaphor for Michael's new-found desire to no longer be "metal". This track emphasises this to a point, being a very dull and boring soft rock sachet of his feelings. However, as if to counter this, we immediately clamber into "The Calling", which not only was co-written by (at the time formerly of ) Iron Maiden's Adrian Smith, it features him on guitar as well, and suddenly the whole tempo of the album is lifted. This is a much better song, with Michael's vocals soaring over a heavier guitar riff and drum beat, and enhanced by a great guitar solo in the middle. Great stuff! So unexpected, and so very appreciated! However, we come screaming back to earth with "Somebody Somewhere", with a dreadfully boring, completely awful, moaning and whining soft rock ballad type song that erases all merit within the first few bars, and does not lift above that again during the course of the song. Oh, but do you think that's bad? Well, take a listen to "Burned Out", which continues down that same path, and yet manages to even out do the previous song with awfulness. So this is what Michael's vision of music was, that which dragged Chameleon into one of the most disappointing albums I have ever bought? Wow. This really is just... unbelievable.
You wonder then how you can then come up with the next song, "New Horizons". Co-written again with Adrian Smith, but also here with former band mate Kai Hansen. After two songs that made me feel my life was seeping away from me, this clicks straight back into gear, and brings a close approximation of metal back to the album. It isn't as 'metal' as "The Calling", but the solo break is a dream, picking out both guitarists solo's is just so easy, and both are brilliant. It's like chalk and cheese between these two tracks and everything else on the album, and an indication of what we may have gotten a few years before this. What a shame.  "Hunted" seems to have a bit of this harder stuff seep into it just from being placed next to it on the album, and is much more listenable because of it.
"Always" is a dreadful piano based ballad, something that does not appeal to me in almost any form. It is written and dedicated to the memory of former Helloween drummer Ingo Schwichtenberg, who had committed suicide the previous year. For that, I am willing to forgive this song its liberties. "Thanx a Lot!" has Michael using effects on his vocals. Why does Michael Kiske need effects on his vocals?! Madness. "Time's Passing By" is very AOR oriented, utilising acoustic and clean guitar most of the way through, thus shunting any hint of power out of the song. There are so many styles being utilised here it's hard to keep track. I don't know what "So Sick" is. Is it a carnival song? Is it a way for the band to have one song that stands out from the pack in a slightly different, interesting manner? I'm not sure. It's different in a stylistic way, and Michael goes with the effects on his vocals again, but not in a way that would be regarded as memorable in a good way. Then, to close out this boredom-fest in style, we have the ten-and-a-half minute ballad "Do I Remember a Life?", which drags on interminably, never really sure when or if it wants to end. Great gosh almighty, it takes a certain amount of courage and will power to hang in for the entire song.

Like I said at the start, I knew what I was in for when I went in to this. It was only in the hope that I could find something out of the ordinary, something unexpected, that I made the effort to find this and listen to it. And to be honest, both "The Calling" and "New Horizons" were enough to say that it wasn't a complete waste of time to track it down. And it was nice to have a song that was dedicated to the memory of Ingo. But the rest really does belong in the crap bucket of easy listening soft rock or something of the sort. Without those two songs, this could well have been a zero.

Rating:  The further you get the more you use it up.  1/5

Listen to full album here